169+ Best Pickup Lines for Husband  [Super, Quick, Cheap, Funny]Best Pickup Lines for Husband 169+ Best Pickup Lines for Husband  [Super, Quick, Cheap, Funny]

We all want husbands at the end of the day. We want someone we can spend the rest of our lives with. While that may seem scary, it is very much possible.

All you need to do in order to get a husband is to play the long game. But in order to play the long game, you must find someone you like and develop a relationship with them, and these will certainly help you with that. 

Cheesy Pickup Lines For Husbands 

Having a husband can be tough sometimes with their innate desire to use adorable and cheesy dad puns. However, you can definitely get back at them by using the following.

The following are cheeky, adorable, and the best ones to go for whenever you seek a cute eye roll and laugh from your husband. 

  • You are the man of the house, and I like smashing the patriarchy. 
  • You are definitely the father figure I have been looking for all my life. 
  • I wonder if it would be only our kids who call you Daddy. 
  • How do you feel about practicing making kids?
  • I would be more than happy to practice some baby makings with you. 
  • I do have a name, but I think I prefer it when you call me by your last name. 
  • The only thing I have ever wanted from you, for now, was your last name. 
  • Your last name suits me better than it suits you. 
  • Your shirts can be recycled as my dresses. How do you feel about testing that out?
  • I think our lips would be better when they are kissed. 
  • I bet I could taste things off of your lips. Shall I?
  • You have always been able to hold your liquor, but I am trying to get you intoxicated with me. 
  • I have never struggled with addiction except when I am with you 
  • I think I am drunk in love when it comes to you. 
  • You will be mistaken if you think I am drunk. I am mostly intoxicated in love with you. 
  • I think your lips would be best friends with mine. 
  • I think I have the perfect company for your lips. 
  • I hope you know that there are more than one pair of lips for your lips. 
  • Your lips would be better when they are kissing mine than whatever they are doing right now. 
  • I wonder if you ever feel like showing off what amazing things that mouth of yours can do. 
  • I would treat you like a king and worship you like you are my very own religion. 
  • I have never been very religious, but I would pray to you if you were my God.  

Funny Pickup Lines For Husbands 

Making the special someone laugh because of your sense of humor is a great feeling. But, unfortunately, that feeling does not go away even after you end up married to that special someone.

That is why there are some one-liners that can help you get your special someone laughing for you. 

  • I feel like I have no navigation skills because, without you, I am lost. 
  • Boy, you must be the GPS because I have no clue where I am without you. 
  • I hope you have a map that leads me t your heart. 
  • Your heart seems like the best place for me to stay for the rest of my life. 
  • I hope your heart has a place for one because I am planning on coming there and never leaving. 
  • I would be more than happy to be a permanent resident of your heart. 
  • If there is anyone who owns me, it would be you. 
  • Dreams never really come true until we meet. Then it always comes true. 
  • You are my dream that came true without even hoping it would. 
  • I never knew what hope meant until we met. 
  • If I had a dime for every time I thought of you, I would be able to take you out for golf. 
  • Golf clubs are not the only thing that you swing that hard, is it?
  • If you ever want to test out your stamina level, I would be more than willing to help you out with that. 
  • I think you can put being sexy as a job. 
  • If being sexy gave you money, you would not need to work every day. 
  • If I could quit my job and spend every day with you, I would be more than willing to. 
  • You are like the sun. The moment I have sunglasses on, I can stare at you for a lot longer. 
  • I definitely do not have a 20/20 vision. I have 10/10 vision because you are the only 10 I see. 
  • You would look so much better as the only ten in my life. 
  • You are a nine, and I am a one. Together, we would make the perfect score. 
  • I wonder if you ever feel guilty for being as sexy as you are. 

Short Pickup Lines For Husband 

Seamlessly blending cute pickup lines into the conversation to make your husband feel loved, attractive, and still coveted after s very important.

That is why there are some one-liners that can help you with that. These are easy to use in conversation and perfect for long-term use if you wish to make them feel loved and chased after. 

  • You are the only distraction I care about. 
  • You would be the most welcomed distraction in my life. 
  • You would be better off distracting me. 
  • Boy, are you my favorite movie because I can not seem to focus on anything except you. 
  • You would go down in history as the perfect Ten I have ever laid my eyes on. 
  • You have nice fitted pants, I see, but I think they would look better on my bedroom floor. 
  • My bedroom seems lonelier without you. 
  • My life needs a rock, and you can be the rock for me. 
  • You have rocked my life completely, so I want to rock yours tonight. 
  • My bed is the best fertility clinic if you are looking to be a father. 
  • I have a good place for you to test out your stroke game. It is called my bedroom. 
  • If you are looking forward to becoming a father, I would be more than happy to sit on your lap and call you daddy. 
  • I hope there is a bandaid in your pocket because I think I may have hurt myself when I fell for you. 
  • I have never fallen on my heels, but I would fall for you, no questions asked. 

Quick Pickup Lines For Husband

Do you want to leave butterflies in your husband’s tummy the way you did when you first met or started dating? Fear not.

The following will definitely help you as they are the best one-liners you can go for to add quickly into the conversation to make their heart go pitter-patter. 

  • I have heard that diamonds and nothing last forever. Whichever you wish to be, I would be open to receiving it. 
  • You remind me of diamonds because you are very hard, and you can definitely please a girl. 
  • I have always felt that you are good at pleasing me with how hard you can be. 
  • Your body is rock hard, just like how hard you can be for me. 
  • I think you have stolen all the blue from the sky. 
  • You take the blue feelings out of my heart. 
  • You are scalding hot like my morning tea. 
  • I do not know if I want to have you for breakfast or make you breakfast every morning. 
  • I think you would be much better at being my breakfast than making my breakfast. 
  • I am an amazing cook, and I am a better meal. 
  • I think I am enough for you as breakfast, lunch, and dinner 
  • I bet I would be a healthy snack that you can munch off whenever you are feeling hungry. 
  • I can not only satiate your hunger, and I bet I can satiate your thirst as well. 
  • I think you are thirsty- maybe for water, maybe for me. I am not quite sure. 
  • I do believe I will feel much better after you give me some of your vitamin D. 
  • I think the only vitamin you need to religiously take is vitamin Me. 

Crazy Pickup Lines For Husbands 

Do you ever find yourself missing the way you left your crush completely breathless after you met them? Do you miss seeing your partner look so smitten with you?

Well, the following can definitely help you with that. These pickup lines are the ones to go for if you want to leave them breathless even after years of marriage. 

  • You remind me of a mirror maze because every time I look into you, I see myself. 
  • I could get lost in you as people get lost in mirror mazes. I feel like a maze when I am with you because I definitely get lost in you. 
  • You have me losing myself in you like people end up losing themselves in mazes. 
  • I think you are the magnet because I simply can pull myself away. 
  • I hope you have the number of an ophthalmologist because ever since I met you, I can definitely not take my eyes off of you.
  • You make me feel like I am completely made of iron because I simply can not pull away from your magnetism. 
  • You are the North to my South because we are completely stuck to one another. 
  • I wonder if I am like your conjoined twin because I am definitely attached to the hip with you. 
  • I wonder if your father even exists because no normal human can even create someone like you.  
  • I do believe you are like God’s child because how are you this perfect?
  • I bet God took his extra time when he made you because there is no way any human has created you. 
  • Your eyes drown me completely like I am in the ocean. 
  • So when do I have to let you go home? I bet heaven feels empty without you. 
  • Until I met you, I was not sure heaven even existed, but you definitely are. 
  • You are the ideal son outside the bedroom and the father in the bedroom.
  • I think the Stars would rage wars for you. 
  • I think Yoda is one I always want to be with, even after so many years of marriage. 

Cheap Pickup Lines For Husbands 

After years of marriage, every spouse might struggle to feel like their partner is sexually attracted to them.

Yet, this physical attraction is essential to maintain a healthy relationship between them.

This healthy relationship can be established and continued by using the following one-liners because these will definitely get the gears turning. 

  • I do believe in love at first sight, but I would be open to having you walk by me several times. 
  • The sun rises every day, just like my love for you increases every day. 
  • I feel like your love for me is the constant in my life that I have been looking for all my life. 
  • My phone seems to not be functioning properly because there is definitely a lack of morning texts from your number. 
  • You are the hot blonde I have been looking forward to my whole life. 
  • My phone book was incomplete until you gave me your number. 
  • Even after years of marriage, I still believe you are a magician because the feeling I get when I am with you is magical. 
  • I believe you are a magician because you can definitely stop time around us whenever we are waiting. 
  • Whenever our eyes meet, I feel like everything else ceases to exist. 
  • How come you are never tired of running around in my life all the time?
  • You are the constant ball of energy that I have been seeking for so long. 
  • You would be perfect if you were the pillow I could sleep on. 
  • I do not know if we married because of love or because you are my personal heater. 
  • I am your biggest fan, and you are my personal heater. I think that makes us the perfect couple. 
  • How come you are always warm while I am always cold? Perhaps that is the sign that us to be the best couple because thermodynamic equilibrium is important. 
  • I am so glad you know how to perform CPR because every time I see you in a suit, my heart stops. 
  • I hoped CPR was not the only way you could touch my chest, and marriage seems to solve that problem. 
  • I have always wanted t be cuffed with you, and it seems like rings are much more socially acceptable than cuffs. 
  • I think our rings tie me down to you better than the ropes you use on me. 

Super Cheesy Pickup Lines For Husbands 

Every husband loves puns. Puns are one of the most common and the easiest way to figure out whether your spouse has a similar sense of humor to yours. That is why these pickup lines are the best ones to go for.

They add the cheeky and funny sides of the puns together to make sure that the relationship stays afloat and you feel the same amount of love for them that you felt so many days prior when you two first met. 

  • I did not know I married a thief because you repeatedly stole my breath away. 
  • Your lips are meant for kissing and cherishing. 
  • You are the most precious item in his house. 
  • You would be in jail if stealing my heart was a crime. 
  • Even though we have been married for a while, do you think if I reported the fact that you stole my heart, you would go to jail?
  • Your getting on your knees for me once was more than enough to encourage me to get on my knees for the rest of my life. 
  • I do not think you have the license to kill anyone, and yet you murdered my pussy last night. 
  • I should call PETA because you did beat that pussy up all night long. 
  • You have a license, and that is for driving girls crazy, especially me. 
  • I feel like the only driver’s license you have is to drive me crazy. 
  • You could be driving me a car, but instead, you prefer driving me crazy. 
  • I think you would be the only date I would remember. 
  • You would be better as an important date in my history with men.
  • Can I check your pockets because I do believe you have something of mine? 
  • I think my heart is stolen, and I have a feeling it is in your pocket. 
  • Your pocket seems a little bulged. I am sure you are either happy to see me or you have something of mine in your pocket. 
  • Your pocket seems to be like a wonderland because you do have my heart and my virginity card there, and yet it seems like it is not stuffed to the brim. 
  • Stuffing me with your love will only end with you getting stuffed with food. 
  • I was never the one in charge of the finances in the family, but I do believe I know what a banker feels like because I definitely have an interest in you. 
  • Not a lot of people can afford you, but my interest in you keeps rising. 
    • I was always told to chase after things that are important to me, and you happen to be one of them

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