Attention! This article is so sassy it might burn the people around you. Of course, the unwanted ones only.
How tiresome it is to keep saying “No” to those who do not shy away from throwing their cheesy, cliché pick-up lines at you all the time! It’s high time you give them a taste of their medicine now.
What better way to counterbalance their pathetic pick-up lines with dramatic anti-pick-up lines? Be ready to be the girl (or boy, we don’t discriminate here) on fire!
Funny Anti-Pick-Up Lines
There are two ways you can pull off an anti-pickup line, be sassy, or be funny. Coming right up with the funny ones you can do!
You and I are here at the same bar; it must mean something.
Yeah! It means that I’m looking for someone who would be up to my standards.
I think we went on a date a few years ago? Or did we go on two?
Ohh, I clearly remember making the same mistakes twice in the past.
Hey, I thought that you should dance tonight.
Yeah? Sure, but not with you.
No, you can’t dance with me either; I’m swift. But it would be in your best interest if you tried dancing and losing some weight.
I think I can read your mind. You want me tonight.
But this book is not a bestseller; I got to rewrite it as soon as possible.
I am not claiming to be a genie, but I can grant three of your wishes. Now that I’m here tell me the rest of the two wishes.
Second wish: getting a restraining order.
You are the best-looking girl at this party.
It is only fair that I find the best-looking man then.
Girl, I could give myself to you tonight.
If instead, you do not give yourself to me tonight, tomorrow, or ever.
If I were dying at this moment, I’d want to see you naked once.
Oh, okay, but if I were dying at this moment, I’d want to see you nowhere near me right now. Well, I’m living and still don’t want to see you around me.
Can I sit beside you? If the seat is empty, of course.
Yes, you can. But then my seat would be empty too.
I hope you were not hurt when God dropped you on the earth from heaven.
But Lucifer is not so kind, I suppose; that explains the condition of your face.
If you let me, I will die for you.
I do, I do, I do.
Crazy Anti-Pick-Up Lines
Anti Pick-up lines are not meant to be sanely calculated. Crazier the punch, the more complex the effect. So here are some crazy anti-pick-up lines specially curated for you.
Hi miss, what chances do I get to kiss the most attractive woman at this party?
Almost zero. Get away from me.
Too bad. My chances with you are still higher, though.
You know what, you are like a Pokémon. I want to choose you tonight.
But you are not like a Pokémon because I don’t even feel like catching you in the first place.
This outfit compliments your body.
It would have looked better if it had your blood in it.
You know there is a “U” and “I” in Beautiful?
You know there is a ‘U’ and a ‘Y” in ugly?
Why are you looking at me?
Well, I thought you were pretty, but clearly, I need better glasses.
I can not believe I did not find you sooner.
I can not believe I was lucky until today, but now you have found me.
May I have this dance, please?
Of course, find someone.
Your place or my place?
Me to my place, any day.
Wow, your coat looks so gorgeous on you! May I take it off, though?
Thanks, but your skin would make an even better one. Can I wear that, please?
How much did you pay for this dress?
It looks expensive, right?
Yeah, but you are sweating so badly. You might ruin this dress and want to buy a new one soon.
Rare Anti Pick up Lines
Not sticking to the age-old cliché of anti-pick-up lines is a key to slaying the one-liner. Opt for a rare anti-pick-up line to stun your unwanted suitor.
Daaamn, isn’t your ass jobless now that your mouth is throwing out so much shit?
Your brain stopped working long ago; there’s nothing right on your left side of the brain and nothing left on the right side of the same.
The month of July reminds me of you; no class at all.
You, you are my universe, and I just want to put you first. And you make my stomach turn inside.
If I wanted to lose some weight, I’d climb down your ego and get to your IQ.
You should not go to the museum; the neolithic cave paintings there might make you nostalgic.
Were your parents alright after giving birth on a highway? Cause an accident as you can only happen there!
To hurt you would be the last thing I’d want to do in my life. You better hope I live long.
Oh dear, so they don’t know you? I’m so jealous of them!
Did your face catch on fire? It looks like someone tried to put it out with a fire extinguisher.
My heart goes out to any thought crossing your mind; they must have been so lonely throughout the journey
Brains and beauty aren’t everything. But by looking at your face and scrutinizing your personality, I can say they are nothing.
Good Anti Pick up Lines
You want to leave the irritating guy speechless, don’t you? Pick up a few good anti-pick-up lines from this list to achieve your goal.
Evolution can sometimes go in the opposite direction; I mean, look at you.
Your face is so unique it makes me want to die, and I’d rather live.
How would you rate the human race as a species? We would like to know the point of view of an outsider.
You are brilliant at styling your hair like that; how did you get the hair to come out of your ears like that?
I would not even bother insulting you, as that would be way beyond your capacity to comprehend.
It is funny how people can have two faces, and the chances of either being pretty are still zero.
The human brain is the most complicated mechanism in the universe; I’m jealous of your easy life.
Keep talking; the chances of saying something remotely intelligent are not zero.
I would call a woman who goes out with you not pretty but desperate.
Your lips are so soft. I wonder how duct tape would feel there.
You are an exception for those who never forget a faction.
Don’t worry about those pants making you look bulkier. I mean, they just could not even if they wanted to.
I have so much respect for you, but I would have much more of that if you were dead.
Fat Penguin is the only icebreaker I can think of while talking to you.
It’s a great honor to talk about someone so intelligent, hardworking, and charismatic. But I feel dishonored having to talk about you right now.
Best Anti Pick up Lines Ever
Make an epic comeback with your witty one-liner from below. These are a few examples of the best anti-pick-up lines ever.
I’d have gone out with you if my all-time favorite commercial had not been playing on TV.
I bet you did not need a nanny when you were a small child. You must have rocked yourself to sleep every time you fell and could not get up.
When you were born, the doctor was unfortunate. He tried his best, and you still pulled through.
Are both of your parents physically impaired? Because you are so special.
I’m so sorry you must see your face every day, it must be hard for you.
Will you go out with me this Saturday?
I’m having a headache coming up will catch you later, though.
You look familiar; have I seen you somewhere?
Unfortunately, yes. I stopped going there for the same reason.
If you want to take me out on a date, I must tell you that I only like eggs unfertilized.
You are defying a major law of physics! Your mass is high, and you are not attracting anyone.
I am going to keep you up all night long.
I’m sure you are; my nightmares always do that.
Well, if you know how to please a lady, why aren’t you leaving already?
Short Anti-Pick-Up Lines
Please don’t make the one-liner so long that the guy fails to make meaning out of it; not everyone is as smart as you! Instead, pick these short anti-pick-up lines as your go-to.
I wonder if beauty runs in your family. The answer is no.
In that black dress, you are taking my breath away. You are a dementor for sure!
Of all the things the lord could take from the sky to give you, he chose thunder for your thigh.
So many good-looking men are in this room, and I’m the only one who bothers to talk to you.
What is the body count? I mean, how many guys have you dated till today? Thank goodness, I was scared thinking you saw my basement.
I know how many people have called you beautiful before. It’s a zero, and I see the reason.
You are the type who puts a lot of sugar in her cereal. I mean, look at how much you weigh.
You must have fallen from heaven. The floor around you has cracks.
I want to buy you a drink.
No, it’s okay, give me the money instead.
You are so beautiful, I would date you.
Talking about beauty, I don’t want to date you.
What’s hiding under all that makeup, girl?
Try it yourself; you might want to hide your pathetic face.
I would not mind going to the end of both worlds for you.
Promise me you will stay there.
Mr. Handsome, I want to have your name so bad.
Your parents did not bother giving you one?
Catchy Anti-Pick-Up Lines
Here is a list of catchy anti-pick-up lines for you; choose what compliments your personality.
You are so different from all the other girls, and I wish there were something between us, like a wall.
I want to take you home so you can make me a coffee.
You make all my wildest dreams come true. The wildest one I have seen so far was more like a nightmare.
I can’t find anything hotter than you, except for one thing, my fridge.
Hey man, you look like the main character of a movie! I saw you in “Wrong Turn” with an ax.
There is a beautiful woman hidden behind every fat woman. Now move aside. Let me see her.
You are like a math test, and I would not mind cheating on you.
If I were a thief, I would steal your purse. I would not need your heart.
Awesome Anti Pick Up Lines
We will help you choose from these excellent anti-pick-up lines given below! Get started.
Are you sure you are not under the terms and conditions? Because I do not give a shit to you.
I feel like you need the sun. It’s because you’re shady as hell.
The word pretty does not have U. fortunately, the word ugly does.
Mind if I borrow your map? I want to get the hell away from you as soon as possible.
Santa has disappointed me this year. You are not what I want as my Christmas present.
I would have insulted you if your genetics had not done that for me already.
Girl, are you a slot machine? I always regret putting things inside you.
Your personality and face confirm my suspicion of your virginity.
This party would have been so much better if only you had walked away sooner!
Girl, you are a natural, and I don’t doubt it. Natural disasters are known for ruining things.
If there were a competition in losing, you would lose.
You are the sun of my life. And I can’t find my shades.
- None Found
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